Do you read the trashy tabloids while you wait in line at the grocery store? What headlines grab your attention and why?
It’s been a long time since I’ve perused the headlines of one of those tabloids that used to grace every checkout stand in every grocery store. I remember the days when Elvis sightings seemed to be the main headline each and every week, followed closely by alien abductions. But now I gravitate towards self-checkout (I’m faster than most of the cashiers!) so I don’t stay caught up on the “news.”
So, I decided to make a visit to the website of one of the more famous of the tabloids. With a certain royal wedding in the news, I picked a good week for it. The top headline screamed “Meghan Markle’s Secret First Husband Found.” (We all knew she’d been married before, right?)
Then we get a story about William Shatner hitting on his co-stars. Yawn. Move along.
Ah, another story inspired by the royal wedding. Decades of dirt! Bizarre lost sex secrets of the royal family! Let’s find out about what sex toys they use. Because sex sells.
There’s about five more stories tied to the wedding, neatly interspersed with the sordid stories of other celebrities. To my disappointment, not a single Elvis or alien in site. So here’s my headline-“Elvis attends the royal wedding in disguise!”
Let’s try another one. “Meghan Markle’s first husband was an alien!” Or “Is Prince Harry a virgin?” How about “Did the ghost of Princess Diana walked Meghan Markle up the aisle?”
I could keep going- “Harry and Meghan’s marriage doomed” but I don’t want to have all the fun. Make up your own headline and share it in the comments. In the meantime, I’m going to check out and see what the other authors favorite tabloid headlines are.
May 21, 2018
Do you read the trashy tabloids while you wait in line at the grocery store? What headlines grab your attention and why?
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